Denial
by EvrDeadly
Summary: Working through life's hardest parts. Often centered around love.


S'up

**S'up? Don't own anyone in the InuYasha series, even if I wish I did...**

"Dragon Strike." That was the last thing that Rin heard. That, paired with a bright blue flash of light as she flew back and hit the back of the small hut, and blacked out when her head snapped back and hit the wall.

Rin groaned as she came to and turned over. She was fully awake when she felt warmth rest on her mid-back, "Rin, are you hurt." Said as a statement, but meant as a question.

She arched her back and sat up, "Uhh, Rin thinks she's...ah!" A sharp shot through her head, and she intsictively curled up on the floor, gripping the side of her head.

"Rin, what is wrong." She didn't respond, for fear that the pain would return. It was slowly dispersing, and she was recovering. "Rin." His tone was firm, and she knew she had to respond. he looked up. The pain was almost gone. "What is wrong." Gone.

She sat up and took slow breaths, "Sorry, Rin's head hurt."

Lord Sesshomarudat back against the wall, and pressed his middle fingers on his temples. "You hit your head very hard."

It took Rin a moment to understand, even now, that the statement was a question. "Oh, on the wall?" A brusque nod was the only conformation. "Hai, but Rin's fine now."

Sesshomaru nodded once again, and rose to his feet. Rin was on her feet and walking a few paces behind him. Outside, he gestured to Jaken to come over. Which was instantly complied, as Jaken arrived next to them, Ah-Un's reigns in one hand and staff in the other. Shessomaru then turned back to Rin and gathered her up and put her on the dragon's back. He passed Jaken with a curt 'come,' and walked steadily out of the now partially destroyed village with Jaken following hastily behind him, Ah-Un's reign in hand.

They were going back home, and it would take awhile, so Rin took that to think about the events of the day, and contemplate on possible reasons on her Lord's extreme adverseness to her fighting. It had been 12 years since he had saved her, and 8 years since she had begun her combat training. She was now moderately skilled in both hand-to-hand and weaponry combat, yet he wouldn't let her within 10 feet of an actual fight. She had her own katana, and cached various projectiles and small explosives in her purses and kimonos. Rin had even gone so as to argue and occasionally disobey her Lord because of her desire to help him and be allowed to fight. These endeavors ended in Jaken's favor, and ended abrutly.

Rin shook her head of these thoughts and looked up, through the trees, at the stars. The thoughts returned to her, and she shook them out again, before curling up in a ball on the back of the two-headed dragon and falling asleep.

An hour or two later, Sesshomaru spoke through the darkness, "Jaken."

"Y-yes, milord?"

"We are almost to the shiro. Tell Rin." Jaken nodded, before looking back and seeing Rin sound asleep, and deciding not to awaken her.

They arrived at the castle gates and were let in an hour later. The traveling group made their way to Ah-Un's stable. There, Sesshomaru lifted Rin, bridal style, off the dragon's back. He nodded to Jaken, and he bagen to unhitch and groom their faithful companion as his lord carried Rin to her room.

Inside, Rin suddenly adjusted herself in Sesshomaru's arms, causing him to stop and stare down at her . As she stopped fidgeting, a daydreaming maid ran into Sesshomaru's back, and he lurched forward, causing Rin's head to collide with his breast-plate. Rin's eyes snapped open, and she struggled for a minute, but ceased immediately when Sesshomaru's soft voice, saying her name, traveled to her ears. The bothersome maid had scurried away soon after realizing her mistake.

He adjusted his hold on her again, and continued on his way to her room. Rin stared up at him as they walked, and wondered why he hadn't simply put her down when she woke up.

They reached her room, and he began to shift her around to pull back the blankets, placed her down in the bed, and pulled them back up to cover her. He began to stand to leave, but was stopped as Rin held onto his sleeve.

"The wolves," she murmured, and snapped her head to the side as another faint round of howls sounded in the distance. Rin looked back at her lord with frightened eyes.

He studied her face for a moment, before motioning for her to scoot over. She wriggled towards the wall happily. Sesshomaru lounged on the bed, with his back on the headboard and his still booted feet crossed in front of him on the bed. Rin came closer and layed her head on his forlegs, playing idly with a loose strand of silk on his hakamas. Sesshomaru gently ran a hand through her long black hair, and she was soon asleep.

When he was positive that she was dormant, he gently edged out of the bed and placed her head on a pillow. He brushed a few strads of hair out of her face and kissed her forehead. "Goodnight, Rin," he whispered and left her room without another sound, and proceeded to his study.

He had just finished complying to some random person's demands when the sun peeked over the mounains in the distance. He mentally sighed and trudged from his desk, through the door leading to his room, and collapsed on his bed. There, he fell into his usual light sleep. He had expected Jaken to have woken him up by 8 or 9, but Sesshomaru had risen by himself at 11. He rose groggily from his bed, and changed into another silken ensemble. He exited his closet to find Jaken shooing fluttery maids from the lord's room. Sesshomaru nodded his greeting, and left his swords and armor in Jaken's care as he left for the dining room to check on Rin.

He turned the corner and entered through the double door that led to the dining hall, and saw Rin handing a nearby servant her empty plate. He couldn't help but notice that her usual cheery smile, that seemed to accompanied almost everything that she did, was missing. Why? The servant leaned in and whispered something unheard even to Sesshomaru. She nodded and turned to Sesshomaru. She faltered a smile, which Sesshomaru saw didn't reach her eyes.

"Goodmoring, Shessomaru-sama." She greeted.

He nodded. She rose and walked to him as he glided to the doors that led to the gardens. They exited the room and began their daily mornig walk.

"Oh!" Cried Rin, pointing to the sky, "Look at the butterfly! Isn't it pretty?" He looked up, saw nothing, and heard Rin giggle as she ran from him.

He looked back down, and smirked, "Now, Rin, we have sparring tomorrow. I have much too to do today."

She giggled again, and came out from a flower bush, with a floweret of unknown origin. She lifted it to her nose, and smelled it. He looked around the courtyard, scanning the buildings for the guards. "Sesshomaru?" He turned to her slightly. "Last night...why didn't you put Rin down when Rin woke up?"

"Is that what is bothering you?"

She shook her head, "Rin was just curious."

"Then what is bothering you."

Rin hesitated for a moment before answering, "The wolves havn't left yet, and it will be 13 years tomorrow that Rin has been with Sesshomaru."

He turned fully to her as she took interest in the small flower she had found. He took her hair into his hands and put it into one tight bun in the center of her head. He reached forward and held out his hand in front of Rin. She handed him her flower, and he tucked it carefully into her bun. She mumble her thanks and turned to continue their walk.

"Rin."

"Ye-," Sesshomaru cu her off by pulling her into a hug as she passed him.

"It's ok."

She held two fistfuls of his haori fabric, and burrowed her face deeper into his chest, "I know." They stood there for a minute, before Rin decided it best to return indoors so that she wouldn't further anger her tudor, which so happened to be Jaken. Sesshomaru decided to go to his study and fill out papers and boring stuff like that.

They walked together in silence to Rin's 'classroom.' There, she quickly leaned up and kissed Sesshomaru on the cheek before giggling and taking in the room.He turned away from the door, stunned at Rin's sudden actions, and walked to his study in a daze. Perhaps it wouldn't have been as awkward had she been younger, but she had grown and was now 18. She wanted to fight, and she could. She had disobeyed him to help Jaken in a fight. He massaged his temples and sat back in his study chair; life could suck so bad.

For the rest of the day, their schedules totally overlapped. They ate at different times, and they never saw each other in the halls and corridors.The only chance was when she went to get snack, but she got it directly from the kitchen, and ate it there, while Sesshomaru ate his in the dining hall.

That night, Sesshomaru knocked on Rin;s door. A few moments later, there was a faint 'come in!' Sesshomaru pushed open the door and walked over to her bed. Rin soon emerged from her closet in a dull orange night kimono.She pulled the stool over so it was next to her bed and sat on it facing him, idly brushing her hair.

"Rin."

She stopped and looked at him, "Yes?"

"You should get some rest."

She glanced at the window, and back to him, "But the sun hasn't even set completly yet.

True, the sun hadn't set yet. He sighed and walked onto her balcony. What was he supposed to say? He couldn't just come out and say 'I love you.' She would say 'I love you, too.' But not as a lover, but as a daughter.

Rin finished brushing her hair, put away the brush, replaced the stool under the vanity desktop, and joined Sesshomaru on the balcony. "Rin thinks it's really pretty today."

He turned his head to her, "What is."

She smiled, "The sunset, of course!"

He nodded once and turned his head back to the source of the evening shadows. His eyes remained on Rin, watching her eyes dart around, taking everything at once. He apraoched her and kissed her cheek, and returned to her room. She stood at the balcony railing for a minute, an indistinct smile playing at her lips, before she followed him.

Sitting on her bed, Rin watched as Sesshomaru picked through her many volumes.The silence dragged on, and Rin finally rose and tapped on his shoulder. "Hn."

"Are the wolves here again?" She wasn't sure, but she thought she heard the faint howl of wolves in the distance.

He nodded, "I'll stay in your room for tonight. I'll have the issue sorted out two days from now." She nodded her thanks, and climbed into her bed. She smiled at him as he pulled a chair to her bedside, blew out the candle and returned to her side. As much as he promised himself that he wouldn't, Sesshomaru fell prey to the darkness we know as sleep.


End file.
